Thursday, March 31, 2011

My title was too cliche haha

I told him she's a fragile flower.
But all he did was stomp through the garden.

He stripped away her self-confidence
And whittled down, once a strong tree
Now simply a twig of a thing
Her strength to fight for things she believed in, gone
Because to him, he was always right and while she may have opinions
They never mattered unless she cried.
Tears streaming down her face
Head lowered between her knees
And he might just feel some compassion.
Then he wanted to change but it doesn’t work that way, darling.

Especially if his promises of a better temper
and a less forceful manner don’t ever come true.
Arms stuck out, no option to leave
Forceful, pulling hands
Molding her into something he can handle
She was stuck protecting his outburst and idiotic demeanor
And trying to tell his friends that he doesn’t always mean the things he says
It just ends up sounding mean and harsh
But he’s just saying these things out of love.

Well guess what,
She looks back on his rants and loath full statements
And she realizes something rather surprising.
He never has nor will he ever truly love anyone.
He never loved her; he was too mean to really love
And his helpful suggestions were actually just boosting his self-esteem
 by putting her down.
The stone cold heart,
breaking off and dislodging in others through his words

Even now, as the weeks pass by
He continues with his blood drenched, needle point comments
And she tries her best to close her mind to them
But sometimes it’s just easier to break down
And accept that he will not ever change.
She wants to help him be a better, nicer person
But she’s realizing that it’s pointless.

“Goodbye” she says, tears streaming down her face
As she walks away from the wreck she’s help create.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Nervousnesses

Worthy
worthy
worthy.

Repetition
repetition
repetition.

look around.
what do you see?
bored faces,
fidgeting hands,
wondering eyes
wandering brains.

Open your mouth.
hopeful looks
No, fake a yawn.
Butterflies vomiting
even more butterflies.
 -At least they're not moths!
Shudder, moths...

Someone yawns.
An impatient throat clears.
Look to the clock,
a minutes past.
Crap.
"Get on with it!"
a monty python accented voice yells.
it is ignored.

They don't want,
even if they think
that they do,
to hear my words.
Unless I'm funny.
I twist my hands,
take a deep breath,
look down at the pink words.
 -God, I hope I'm funny
and begin.

"Arabellaaaaaaaaa!"

Nice things too

If you're not lying
and you truly believe
everything you're saying
and you seriously want
to spend time on
convincing me of this "love" things
then I want to know
what I've done
to deserve such a friend.

What fantastic deeds
have I done?
I can list all
of the awful and cruel things
just from this morning.
So what is it that you see?
Surly a person
as astounding as you
wouldn't want to spend time
fixing me?


Both of you,
for that matter,
should be bettering yourselves
and worrying about
your own problems.
Forget about me,
I'm really too stubborn
and obviously not worth
your time.

Yet,
if you read these words
you'll be resisting
the urge to smack me
 -not that I don't deserve it
but maybe
just maybe
I do deserve
some nice things too